We rode horseback all around the island of Hawaii (the crooked road
making the distance two hundred miles), and enjoyed the journey very much.
We were more than a week making the trip, because our Kanaka horses would
not go by a house or a hut without stopping--whip and spur could not alter
their minds about it, and so we finally found that it economized time to
let them have their way. Upon inquiry the mystery was explained:
the natives are such thorough-going gossips that they never pass a house
without stopping to swap news, and consequently their horses learn to regard
that sort of thing as an essential part of the whole duty of man, and
his
salvation not to be compassed without it. However, at a former crisis
in my life I had once taken an aristocratic young lady out driving, behind
a horse that had just retired from a long and honorable career as the moving
impulse of a milk wagon, and so this present experience awoke a reminiscent
sadness in me in place of the exasperation more natural to the occasion.
I remembered how helpless I was that day, and how humiliated; how ashamed
I was of having intimated to the girl that I had always owned the horse
and was accustomed to grandeur; how hard I tried to appear easy, and even
vivacious, under suffering that was consuming my vitals; how placidly and
maliciously the girl smiled, and kept on smiling, whle my hot blushes baked
themselves into a permanent blood-pudding in my face; how the horse ambled
from one side of the street to the other and waited complacently before
every third house two minutes and a quarter while I belabored his back
and reviled him in my heart; how I tried to keep him from turning corners,
and failed; how I moved heaven and earth to get him out of town, and did
not succeed; how he traversed the entire settlement and delivered imaginary
milk at a hundred and sixty-two different domiciles, and how he finally
brought up at a dairy depot and refused to budge further, thus rounding
and completing the revealment of what the plebeian service of his life
had been; how, in eloquent silence, I walked the girl home, and how, when
I took leave of her, her parting remark scorched my soul and appeared to
blister me all over: she said that my horse was a fine, capable animal,
and I must have taken great comfort in him in my time--but that if I would
take along some milk-tickets next time, and appear to deliver them at the
various halting places, it might expedite his movements a little.
There was a coolness between us after that.
from Roughing It, 1872