About two years ago, our little dog, Harley, hurt his back. We were at the emergency vets at about 1 am. After the vet examined him, we were told that he would probably need surgery. We would take him to a surgeon the very next day.
  We left the emergency vet about 2am. We were given a prescription for valium for Harley to take until we could get him to the surgeon. The prescription was made out to Harley Bartlett. At 2am I walk into the Revco Drug Store next to Richland Memorial Hospital with Harley's prescription. I have never seen so many sick people in my life. Why are so many people sick at this time of the night? They're not there during the day. At least I never see them. It was like a Waffle House.
  Finally it's my turn. I give the young lady the prescription and she asked me if I had ever had a prescription filled there before. My answer was "No". She said that I would have to fill out a patient profile. I attempted to explain that Harley was a dog. The pharmacist who was standing near by said "It's the law, you have to fill out a patient profile". There I was, in Revco, 2am, filling out a patient profile on Harley Bartlett. Name: Harley Bartlett, Age: 5 years old, Weight: 18 lbs, Height: 8 inches and on and on. Social Security number? I called to the pharmacist. " Excuse me sir, Harley doesn't have a social security number. Can he use mine?" Of course not, he shouted. Leave it blank. I finally finished and gave the form back to the clerk.
   After I met everyone in Revco, the prescription was filled. As the clerk called " Mr. Harley Bartlett" I stepped to the counter. The clerk looked at the pharmacist and asked, "Do I really have to explain this to him?" "It's the law. You have to explain it to him." She actually explained this to me. " Sir, This is a class one narcotic. Harley should not drink alcohol or drive a vehicle while taking this medication." Everyone who could hear this started laughing. I explained that I would watch him very closely and not let him near the beer and I would hide the keys. Thank you very much.
So the next time you have to fill out a form at the pharmacy, don't feel so bad. Remember that little Harley had to do it too.

Carl